Sep 15 / Doug Reed

Forgiveness – Letting Go of Resentment and Moving On from Past Hurts

Today we’re diving into one of the most transformative, yet often overlooked aspects of personal growth and reinvention… Forgiveness.

And no, we’re not just talking about saying “I’m sorry” or “It’s okay.” We’re going deeper.

We’re talking about the kind of forgiveness that frees you. The kind that clears space for clarity, creativity, peace, and purpose.

The kind that lets you finally move on—after being laid off from a Fortune 1000 company, leaving a government job that drained you… or waking up one day realizing, “This job? This life? It doesn’t fulfill me anymore.”

This article is about letting go of resentment—toward others, toward systems, and even possibly, toward yourself—so you can move forward and truly design the life you want to live

Let’s start with the big myth: Forgiveness is not about excusing bad behavior.

It’s not about forgetting. And it’s not about letting people off the hook.

Forgiveness is about you.

It’s about refusing to let past pain dictate your present mindset or future choices.

Because here’s what most people don’t realize:

When you hold on to resentment—toward your employer, your manager, that co-worker who sabotaged your project—you are chaining yourself to the very thing that hurt you.

It’s like dragging a weight behind you every step of the way as you try to rebuild your career, your confidence, or your identity.

And you may not even realize it, but that emotional weight shows up everywhere

In your job interviews where you’re overly defensive or passive-aggressive
In your relationships where you're guarded and mistrusting
In your self-talk when you say, “I’ll never succeed again”

You can’t launch a new version of yourself while clinging to the emotional debris of the past.

So let’s reframe forgiveness for what it really is:

Forgiveness is personal power.

Let’s talk real for a minute.

When you’ve been laid off—especially from a large, prestigious organization—it hits your identity hard.

For years, maybe decades, you poured your time, energy, and loyalty into that job.

You sacrificed weekends. You skipped vacations. You went the extra mile.

And then… a meeting. A decision. A severance letter.

Suddenly, you’re out—and the company moves on.

That kind of loss? It doesn’t just hurt your finances.
It hurts your pride. It hurts your sense of worth. It can shake your entire self-image.

And resentment creeps in:
“They didn’t value me.”
“I gave them everything, and this is how they repay me?”
“I’ll never trust anyone again.”

Sound familiar?

Here’s the thing: that bitterness is understandable—but it’s toxic if it stays.

It can make you second-guess your worth. It can make you sabotage future opportunities. And worst of all? It can make you play small, because deep down you’re afraid of getting hurt again.

But forgiveness? Forgiveness gives you your edge back.
It says, “That chapter ended, but I am not finished.”

Here’s a little truth bomb:
The layoff might not have been your fault—but it is now your responsibility to heal from it.

No one else can do that work but you.

Science backs this up, too.

When you hold onto anger or resentment, your brain stays in a heightened state of stress. Your body is constantly pumping cortisol, the stress hormone. Your immune system weakens. Your focus blurs. You become reactive instead of strategic.

But when you forgive, your parasympathetic nervous system—the one responsible for rest, healing, and recovery—activates.

Suddenly, you start to think more clearly. You become creative again. You sleep better. Your energy returns.

Think about that…

Forgiveness isn’t just spiritual—it’s physiological.

It literally changes your brain chemistry.

It’s not just a soft skill—it’s a strategic advantage.

So if you’re serious about building a better future, forgiveness isn’t optional—it’s essential.


So let’s get practical.

If you want to truly forgive, you’ve got to start by getting honest about what’s still hurting.

Ask yourself:

  • Who do I still feel bitterness toward?
  • What situations still trigger me emotionally?
  • Have I truly forgiven myself for past choices?

Maybe it’s your former boss…
Maybe it’s the HR system…
Maybe it’s the friend who didn’t support you…
Maybe it’s yourself—for not leaving sooner or for tolerating too much.

Here’s what I want you to hear loud and clear:

You did the best you could with what you had at the time.

And that deserves compassion, not condemnation.

Forgiveness begins when you acknowledge the pain without letting it define you.

Write a letter to the person—or system—you’re forgiving. You don’t have to send it. Just write it.

Then say:
“I release this pain. I forgive, not because they deserve it—but because I do.”

Let’s look ahead.

Once you let go of resentment, here’s what becomes possible:

You start to dream again.
You’re open to new opportunities without dragging skepticism into every room.
You rebuild your self-worth, not based on a title or salary, but based on who you are.

Forgiveness creates space for:

New careers
New relationships
New levels of peace, creativity, and freedom

I’ve learned of people that went from completely defeated to landing their dream jobs—not just because of resumes or interviews—but because they finally let go of the mental and emotional clutter.

They forgave. They healed. And then they soared

Alright, here’s your Life by Design 360 Challenge:

Take 10 minutes this week—just 10—and write down the name of one person or organization you need to forgive.

Ask yourself:

What hurt me?
What am I still carrying?
What am I ready to release?

Then write this statement:

“I choose to forgive and let go. I am free. My past does not control my future.”

Say it out loud. Feel it. Repeat it daily.

And watch how your energy shifts.

Remember—your ability to forgive isn’t weakness. It’s strength.

It’s not about erasing the past—it’s about reclaiming your future.

Forgiveness is how you cut the cord to what no longer serves you—and step boldly into the life you’re meant to live.

This is how we build lives by design—not by default.

You’re in for a very special treat tomorrow on our LifeByDesign360 Tuesday article. I’ll give you every secret, every strategy, every technique we know of to help you get through a layoff, find the best job with the best benefits and set yourself up for massive career success and the pathway for real financial freedom

Be sure at LifeByDesign360 to be sure not to miss any important update.

Each week you'll get specialized info you can’t get anywhere else to help you get the job you want now, create a side hack and an income that you can never get fired from and get on the fastest path to retirement success and financial freedom.

Also be sure to look out for openings in our LifeByDesign360 Insider Academy and Community. There you’ll find all the coaches, the courses, the resources and an amazing community of people going through what you’re going through, who are utilizing the tools for maximum success.

This information gives you the upper edge, no matter what.

Just think of how confident and happy you’re going to be when you know you’ve got the income and the financial independence to do whatever you want, whenever you want. It’s awesome!

If this article resonated with you, share it with someone you care about. Let’s create a ripple effect of healing and growth.

I’m Doug Reed—reminding you that the best is still ahead. But first, you’ve got to let go of what’s behind.

Until next time—take care of yourself. You’ve got this.
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